Sexual assaults– they need to stop

Sexual assault is an issue all over the world. It happens almost every day and people still do not understand the concept that it’s not the victims’ fault. Blaming the victim triggers more problems.

People look at sexual assault from a different perspective because they make remarks such as, “you provoked the person,” “well what were you wearing?” “how were you acting?” “what state of mind were you in that allowed the person to do that?” These people are wrong to go and blame the person, little do they know the struggle they have to overcome.

It doesn’t matter how a person is acting, wearing, or the state of mind they’re in! A person should be able to feel safe in their own skin rather than wanting to crawl out of their skin because they were violated. A predator goes after their prey no matter what because they want to. The attacker believes it’s okay because society has shown that it’s the victim’s fault and most people who speak up and try seeking justice don’t get it because they let off the attackers so easily or they just dismiss the whole situation. In a lot of sexual assault cases happen in relationships and people dismiss it only because it’s a person’s partner.

In a relationship, there needs to be consent no matter what the couple will be doing with one another. It is always okay to tell them no and that they aren’t ready. If the partner is pressuring then it isn’t a healthy relationship, and the partner should get out of it for their own safety and well-being. If the significant other says “if you love me you’ll have to do it,” remember you most definitely do not! They’re trying to manipulate their partner to do certain acts that they aren’t comfortable with.

Sixty-three percent of sexual assaults go unreported because of fear, or resentment, or victims are ashamed and don’t know what will happen next in their life or anyone else’s life that’s important to them. Not only are victims affected, but their families. Some families aren’t supportive or understand how they can be affected in many ways. Victims suffer through emotional changes and trust issues and close themselves off to people around them.

Victims look to drugs, alcohol, self-harm, therapy (not always everyone), and sometimes just act out of the ordinary than they normally would. They don’t know how to process what has happen to them. Many victims decide to close that awful part of themselves and push that experience to the back of their mind. But what happens is that they start lashing out and don’t know why until they realize what really happened to them. A simple exposure as a person touching or speaking to them in a certain way can trigger a flashback to that moment. Remembering can cause panic and anxiety attacks.

An anonymous source shares their story. A 7-year-old child was touched by three family members and it happened for years with one certain family member. Never did the child speak up until about the age of 12. When revealing what she experienced her family called her a liar and didn’t believe her until later, but even then her family wasn’t supportive and doubted that it could ever happen. She never accepted what happened to her so she never dealt with her issue. Until after speaking up she felt all the emotions she never did back then. She would remember at random moments and would cry and hurt herself because she didn’t want to talk to anyone in detail for the reason of not wanting to relive the pain. She always had felt it was her fault. 12% of child sexual abuse is reported which means 88% is never reported.

People need to understand that there isn’t anything wrong with the victim but instead with the violator. I don’t understand how people can’t get that through their head. How can a person try moving on from it when the world is being a constant reminder by trying to justify that it’s the survivor’s fault. Nobody asks or wants to be invaded from their body because that’s their temple.

Rather than believing the victim has a problem, they should focus their attention more on the vulture and why they that they were allowed to hurt someone. Look thoroughly inside the mind of the perpetrator and try helping them. 97% of rapists walk without punishment,  97% go out into the world continuing their sickness.

According to RAINN, the anti-sexual violence website, 1 out of every 6 women have either gone through a completed rape or an attempted one. 90% of the victims are women. 17.7 million women have been raped since 1998 and numbers are still increasing.

Everybody needs to understand and help prevent all these issues by focusing on the malevolent and try preventing to lower the amount of victims.

If you or someone you know is experiencing abuse of any kind contact:

National Child Abuse Hotline 1.800.422.4453
Rape, Abuse, & Incest National Network 1.800.656.4673
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1.800.273.8255