Getting married in the Nigerian Igbo culture is an important deal, especially for women. It symbolizes coming of age, prosperity, community, trust, and many more emotions that can only be experienced during the ceremony. An Igba Nkwo, pronounced [eba-un-kwO], is filled to the brim with colors and lively music that connects its guests and allows for the bride and groom to feel connected to their community and marvelous culture.

Getting Ready:

Getting ready is an essential part of an Igba Nkwo. The ceremony requires colors chosen by the bride and groom so the guests are uniform yet still unique in their outfits. Colors range from oranges to blues to purples to greens, allowing guests to visualize the personality of the to-be newlyweds. The women wear a set consisting of an Iro (skirt), Buba (top that may contain sequins) and Gele, a head wrap wrapped with intricacy and attention to detail. All pieces in the set often have a special pattern that follows the color. The men wear a Senator suit which is a set of trousers and an oversized top usually containing embroidery. The senator also has a cap to match.

Arrival:

Upon arriving at the ceremony guests will be greeted by people they don’t know, but in some way, do.

You will exchange your fair shares of “ayyy my sista” or “Kedu, how go dey go” before entering the building. After stepping inside, the scent of Jollof rice and sounds of greetings hit you—immediately immersing you into community.

You see plenty of food and desserts that are not yet ready to be eaten. You are not even hungry, however, the sight of Igbo delicacies make you forget the thought. As you try multiple food samples, you run into relatives and catch up with many more. Your mother calls you to say hi to your “aunties” but they are not your real aunties. Their warm embrace is firm but sweet, ensuring you are in the right place.

The colors inside make the room vibrant. You sing and dance to Afrobeat music even though you don’t know the words. As you are talking to relatives, you meet new people and instantly feel connected.

Before you get the chance to take your next bite, you’re called to take pictures. Even though the photo session seems to drag on, you know this is just the beginning of the next six to eight hours filled with captivating culture.

Ceremony Commencement:

You are seated in one of the numerous chairs that enclose the room. The announcer, who narrates the wedding, begins to say the name of the bride as she ushers out her bridesmaids.

All smiling in Igbo pride, the long line of women dance to the center of the room in their bright purple attire. Once they arrive at the middle, the crowd gets up and proceeds to dance as well. Everyone, ready with cash, showers the women with money as a sign of respect. Dancing, someone calls your name and gives you a couple bills. Following tradition, you throw the money to the middle where the women are dancing and watch it fall.

Once the women are done dancing, the guests happily go back to their seats.

As you sit, you notice the floor once covered with money, is cleared. The bills are seamlessly gone. You estimate that there was at least $1000 dollars collectively thrown. As you are wonder how the bills vanished so quickly, the announcer introduces the groom and his groomsmen.

In the same fashion, they dance joyfully to the middle of the room. You and the guest get up and shower them with money once again. Everyone dances. 

Bride leading in her bridesmaids as they all dance to music. (Cara Amadi / HS Insider)

Wine carrying:

Wine carrying, perhaps, is the most important part of the Igba nkwo ceremony yet the quickest.

The bride is given a cup of wine. After she receives it, she searches for her groom. You look to her, wanting to help and show the bride to her groom, however, you refrain. Smiling, she eventually stumbles upon him. She kneels and takes a sip of the wine before offering it to her soon to be husband. The groom gracefully accepts and sips the wine as the crowd erupts into cheers and applause. As you cheer, you realize that this simple cup of wine has sealed the fate for the couple and promised them unity forever.

Traditional dances and eating:

Now that wine carrying is over, it’s now time to dance yet again.

Everybody in the room stands and proceeds to the dance. Dancing, you see the buffet chock full of Nigerian food and other types of food as well. You take a break from dancing and decide to eat.

Eating, you see that the cake has just been revealed to the room. The dessert contains all the themes of traditional Igbo culture inside of a cake. It is brightly colored and has edible fondant jewelry pieces. The patterns match that of the bride and groom. The four tier cake beams with pride.

Enjoying the delicious cake, you look around the room and realize this is a special part of your culture that should be shared with others willing to listen.

With full stomachs, you and your family begin to say goodbye to family and the new “aunties” and cousins you met. Leaving the music, dancing, family, food, community, and ceremony, you can not wait till you get invited to your next. Walking outside, you look up at the sky and realize that this wondrous ceremony symbolizes pride, unity, and community, proving you are simply Nigerian; simply Igbo.